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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29228007">continuous tense</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/crownedcrusader/pseuds/batofgoodintent'>batofgoodintent (crownedcrusader)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>language of committment [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>DCU (Comics), Nightwing (Comics), Teen Titans (Comics)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>:3c, F/M, and explaining korys perspective bc a lot of fans have no idea what happened, baby mar'i, just mentions of her, mentions of other teen titans, mirage fix-it fic, miriam delgado | mirage, or perhaps not fixing it so much as explaining the ramifications, proposal</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 08:34:40</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>16,296</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29228007</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/crownedcrusader/pseuds/batofgoodintent</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>AKA, five times Dick proposes to Kory, and one time she finally says...</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Dick Grayson/Koriand'r</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>language of committment [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2053956</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>37</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>75</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Dick Grayson is nineteen when he proposes for the first time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I love you. I will always love you. Of course I will marry you.” Those words are perfect, and they should be enough. Dick’s ready to throw his arms around her and spin her around in excitement -- but Kory isn’t finished talking. “My answer is yes, Dick. But, my love… Is this the right time? After what just happened… Would it not be better to wait?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She’s going to ask questions about Mirage, about what had happened while she’d taken Kory’s place. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She's going to ask if he's just marrying her so she won't be upset anymore. She's going to ask why he hadn't noticed the difference between her and Mirage. She's going to ask who was better. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick will do anything to stay with her -- it’s why he’s proposing. But he will also do anything to keep her from asking too many questions about Mirage. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He presses the ring more insistently in her hands.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I love you too. And based on everything we’ve been through lately, I’m sure, now more than ever. You’re the one I want. Why wait?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He’s going to lose her if he doesn’t convince her that he loves her and only her. Marriage is a perfect way to prove it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory had said yes. They had gotten married. They had said I do, they had kissed, they had a marriage license. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Somehow, Dick loses her anyway.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Mar’i And’r-Grayson is seven months old when Dick proposes for the second time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s two in the morning, and Dick has just come back from his first patrol as Nightwing in over a year. Kory is laid back on their bed, half asleep with Mar’i snuggled to her chest. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Properly </span>
  </em>
  <span>snuggled to her chest. She must have fallen asleep nursing again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He strips out of the top half of his costume, then sits on the edge of the bed. Though he’s pretty sure Mar’i is indestructible given her Tamaranean strength and flight -- and boy, had that been a fun, early-morning surprise -- he still doesn’t want her to fall off the bed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Heya, starshine,” he says as he picks up his baby girl. Once she’s safely nestled in his arms, he makes sure she’s still asleep, then carefully moves her to her crib. She doesn’t stir, not even a little -- but Dick watches her sleep for a moment anyway. She’s so perfect, it’s hard to imagine he could have helped create something so tiny and beautiful. He can’t help but smile and gently brush a hand over her downy head. She still doesn’t stir, and Dick finally pulls himself away. Ma’i isn’t the only -and’r that needs to be put to bed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory is a much lighter sleeper than Mar’i, but she is still hard to wake compared to most humans. Still, he tries to be careful. She needs all the rest she can get; her energy has still been low even after giving birth. Nursing takes it out of her. So he is careful and featherlight as he shifts her, not stopping until she’s propped on a pillow and cozy under the sheets. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But before he can finish getting ready for bed himself, Kory sleepily latches onto his arm. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re back early?” she mumbles, cheek pressed to his hand. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Late, actually. You didn’t have to wait up for me, gorgeous.” He presses a kiss to her forehead, gently smoothing her hair away from her face. “I always come back.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mm.” Kory neither agrees nor disagree -- uncharacteristic of the decisive woman she is when she’s awake. Dick can’t help but chuckle. “Where’s Mar’i?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“In her crib,” Dick reassures her. “And you should be asleep, too. Did you want to put on pajamas?” he teases her. “If you’re too tired, I’m sure I can wrangle you into them.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You aren’t as funny as you think you are.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dickjust smiles and rolls his eyes. “You’ve laughed at it before. I think you might just be grumpy.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“On Tamaran, we embrace emotions. I am embracing this grumpiness.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick laughs and presses another kiss to her forehead. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I only avoid pajamas,” Kory says, as if she really needs to say it, “Because our little teu’nor bites more than latches. You don’t wear a shirt when you’re injured, either.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She glances down at his attire; how he’s already removed the top half of his Nightwing suit. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She opens her mouth to ask.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick interrupts before she can. “I’m fine. But that sounds like it hurts, love. How much long do you think she’ll be breastfeeding?” He pauses, then corrects, “Er. Teu… te’uvitan … you know what I mean.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory squints, looking up and down his chest. Any bruises he’s received tonight haven’t turned blue yet, and it’s too dark to make out the more minor ones. She rubs at her forehead, trying to decide whether or not to demand a list of injuries. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then, his attempt at Tamaranean registers. “Te’uvituln, but that was a very cute accent,” she corrects, half-smile on her face. “Tamaranean children te’uvituln for five Tamaranean seasons. Which loosely translates to a year and a half on Earth. Which means we are not even half finished.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She closes her eyes, already ready to fall back asleep.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick looks fondly at her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory doesn’t open her eyes, which gives Dick plenty of time to look without her worrying about what it is he’s seeing. As always, he’s seeing the woman he loves more than anything. No matter that she looks exhausted and stressed. No matter that she has stretchmarks or softer curves than before. No matter that she’s turned more orange than gold. No matter the bags under her eyes, no matter how long it’s been since she’s showered or brushed her hair. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She is still the most beautiful woman Dick has ever seen. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He smiles, unabashedly in love. Then he moves on top of her, knees gently pinning her hips in place. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory blinks open sleepy eyes. “If you’re after sex, I’m game -- but I must warn you I’ll fall asleep part way through.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick just leans down and kisses her. “Not tonight, if you’re not up to it.” He pauses. “But maybe tomorrow. We don’t even need to pencil it in if we’re smart about it. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Shower </span>
  </em>
  <span>sex, maybe.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you trying to be tactical about romance?” Kory complains, but there’s amusement dancing in those tired eyes. “Romance is about </span>
  <em>
    <span>whimsy</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I can schedule in some whimsy, too, if you really want it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She rolls her eyes, but loops an arm around his neck anyways. Though she’s clearly running low on energy, she still finds the strength to pull herself half upright. She returns his kisses softly and sweetly; ghosts of her usual passion. Dick knows what she means behind the sleepiness. Once she’s finished, she presses her forehead to his head and smiles.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know you’re just doing this to distract me, you know,” Kory says, voice thick with sleep. “ Keep me from asking about your first patrol back.”  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Guilty as charged.” Dick kisses her slower and deeper, running a hand through her hair. “But I’m fine, Kory. I was careful. No real injuries.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t like the word ‘real’ in that sentence.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick kisses her again, soft and sweet, then tucks hair behind her ear. “I’m okay.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Not…” She searches for the right word. “Rusty?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Not even a little.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not fair,” she says around a yawn. “It will take me much longer to get back into fighting shape.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sweetheart, once you’ve got your energy back, you’ll be able to throw cars like no one’s business,” he says, kissing her tenderly on the forehead. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You are miles behind me in that department, then,” Kory says, patting his hip. “We will start small. Perhaps you should try to throw -- what are those electric scooters called?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick laughs in surprise. “I’ll add it to my workouts,” he teases. Then, “And I did have to work out the last few weeks. I’m not rusty at all -- I was at the gym whenever I wasn’t with you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mm. I’m glad. I wish you had told me, though. I was worried. And I was wondering where you were these last few weeks…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick opens his mouth to reassure her, but Kory yawns. She closes her eyes again, and Dick bites down a smile. She rests her cheek against his shoulder, already starting to lose the battle against sleep. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There had been a moment earlier, when Dick thought she might be up for something a little more than goodnight kisses. He’ll save it for tomorrow morning instead. Dick pulls back to kiss her on the cheek. Then, he carefully lays her back against their pillows and sheets and starts to tuck her in.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sleep,” he says softly. “I’ve got to get ready for bed, but I’ll be here when you wake up.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mm. You’d better.” She drifts off in less than a minute, still wiped out from te’uvituln and the sporadic sleeping schedule they’ve had since Mar’i’s birth. Dick parts ways to shower and change out of the rest of his uniform. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But even after Dick lies down beside her and intends to fall asleep, his brain won’t turn off. Even though both his favorite girls are here, and safe, and even with Kory acting as the world’s comfiest heat-pack, he can’t fall asleep. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Instead, he shifts to hold Kory from behind, spooning her and looping his arms around her waist. It’s a little awkward with her height and her massive hair, but it’s worth it to hold her for once. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Someday we’ll make this official,” he says softly, lips ghosting against her ear. “I promise.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s not a </span>
  <em>
    <span>real </span>
  </em>
  <span>proposal. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not like when Dick had gone down on one knee eight years ago. When he’d used it to plead for everything to go back to normal, for Kory to know how serious he was about her. For a patch job to heal their relationship after Kory had been kidnapped. When she’d had to relive trauma of no one coming to save her, having to save herself from captivity. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And -- and everything else. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick can’t think about the other details right now. Not with Kory sleeping so soundly. Not when her face still sometimes reminds him of -- of hers. With the wrong expression, with the wrong lighting. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The marriage had been rushed and for all the wrong reasons. Of course it was doomed to fail. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>So </span>
  <em>
    <span>this </span>
  </em>
  <span>isn’t a proposal, not really. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But it’s still a proposal of sorts, even if she can’t hear it. A proposal of </span>
  <em>
    <span>intent </span>
  </em>
  <span>to propose -- which might be a step too elaborate. But Dick is nothing if not from a chronic planner. It will take him many steps to work up the courage to ask again, after the disaster their first wedding was. But he’ll do it. He wants to spend the rest of his life with Kory, and not just because they’re raising Mar’i together.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She really does mean the world to him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But he can't bring himself to ask. Under the surface, he knows exactly why he hasn't asked -- and exactly why he won't. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He tries not to think about it as he falls asleep. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His dreams give him away, though. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Big red hair, a purple costume in the wrong style, and a face that he recognizes, but who smiles wrong, and who wants to own him, body and soul. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick wakes up at five in the morning in a cold sweat. He doesn't get out of bed -- but he spends the rest of the night staring at the ceiling, not daring to look at the woman sleeping next to him. Not daring to wake her to ask if it's really her beside him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>--</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>At least Kory is awake the third time Dick proposes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Mar’i is a year and a half, and has finally stopped nursing, which gives Kory much more energy for the day. She has also taken to carrying Mar’i with her almost everywhere. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s good for human babies, but apparently even more necessary for Tamaranean ones. Dick thinks, privately, that it’s not just because the skin-to-skin contact is important. He’s pretty sure it’s because babies can </span>
  <em>
    <span>fly </span>
  </em>
  <span>on Tamaran, and their mothers needed a way to hold onto them until the children could use that power more responsibly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But when asked about it, Kory insists that it’s about the emotional connection. He won’t deny her that. Still, when it’s his turn to put Mar’i in the baby sling, he makes sure it’s a little tighter. He doesn’t know if her powers of flight are strong enough to lift him, but if she does fly, he’d prefer that she flies them both. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He’s in the middle of singing to her while preparing a meal for himself when he feels hands settle onto his hips. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He turns his head just in time for Kory to give him a good-morning kiss. ...It’s afternoon, but it’s the thought that counts. Dick only got up fifteen minutes ago. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I see you already bundled up our little bumgorf,” she says, then gives their daughter a kiss on the forehead. “Hello, my starshine.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Good morning to you, too,” Dick says, and leans back a little against his girlfriend. Kory supports him easily, and wraps her arms a little more securely around him. It’s a perfect morning. One of the most perfect he’s had since he was a child, he thinks. He can imagine his own parents, John and Mary Grayson, preparing breakfast in the trailer he’d grown up in. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His heart aches at the memory, but it’s easier with Kory behind him, and Mar’i in front. She coos, her little mouth pulling up into a smile. Dick ruffles her hair affectionately. It’s already longer than a human baby’s would be -- almost long and thick enough to put into pigtails. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She’s growing so fast,” Dick says, wonder in his voice. “She is, right? It’s not my imagination?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“By Tamaranean standards, this is almost too fast,” Kory agrees. “It is the human in her. But she is healthy and happy, my love. I see no reason to worry.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick closes his eyes. It’s too perfect. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This moment is going to slip away if he’s not careful. And if he knows himself at all, he’ll be the one to ruin it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The thought catches him off guard. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He doesn’t mean it in a bad way. He’s not sure he means it at all; he’s not sure where it came from. But there’s an underlying worry there. A familiar feeling, years before Mar’i. Years before they were together for the second time. And the moment he realizes the origin of that thought, he buries it. For now, he will ignore it and shove it underneath the warmth in his chest, and the joy of having his two favorite girls on either side of him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory presses a kiss to his shoulder. “What are you thinking of, my love?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How I want this, every single morning,” he says. It’s not a lie. Not exactly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory smiles against his shoulder, and he thinks he’s said the right thing. He puts one hand on top of Kory’s, leaning more securely against her. She rests her chin on top of his head. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The feeling from before goes away. Mirage never held him like this. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He buries her name under the warmth Kory gives off. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I want this every day,” he says again, more intense this time. “Not just waking Mar’i up and holding her and being there for every milestone. I want to be there with </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span>, for the next eighteen years and beyond. I want everything. The house, the kid, the wedding, the - the chaperoning high school dances. All of it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I want it, too.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick’s heart could burst. He wants to ask her to marry him, to make this official. He wants to hear her say yes, right now, in this perfect moment. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He opens his mouth to ask. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But the warmth in his chest is too good. Asking her to marry him, again, would be to acknowledge the again. And he can’t bring himself to spoil today. Can’t bring himself to think about what came before.<br/>
</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Besides, Kory said she wanted it, too. It’s enough to make this morning even better. He turns and kisses her, squishing Mar’i between them. When Kory makes a pleased sound against his lips, Dick wraps his arms around her neck and pulls in closer. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>One perfect moment turns into many, many more throughout the course of the afternoon. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick thinks, when they’re changing the sheets and retiring to sleep, about asking </span>
  <em>
    <span>the question</span>
  </em>
  <span> again. But he sees Kory’s face lit up in the lamplight, and it casts an odd shadow on her usual expression, and for an instant, he thinks-- </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But it’s a stupid thought, and the shadow passes as quickly as it came. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He shakes his head; shakes it off. And when he looks back up, Kory is looking at him with such a tender expression he feels like the lowest person on Earth for ever wondering if it was really her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dick?” she asks, soft and sweet. “Are you alright?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He hadn’t realized his expression had given him away. He laughs, like it’s an absurd question. “I’m great. Today was great.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory’s smile fades at his answer. She furrows her brows, because she has never liked it when he deflects. “Today was great, yes. But… Are you okay to come to bed? Should I sleep in Mar’i’s room tonight?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Simple and sweet and not nearly as judgmental as he deserves.<br/>
</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He thinks about proposing again, right then and there. But given his track record, she would know exactly why he was doing it -- and then they would be forced to talk about it. Besides, he’s learned his lesson. He won’t rush into a proposal to save a relationship. And their relationship isn’t in danger this time, anyway. She told him she wanted him forever just this morning. He's being stupid. So instead, he shakes his head and smiles, forcing it to meet his eyes. “It’s nothing. Or course you’ll sleep here.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not nothing,” she argues, but her voice is so soft and tender that somehow, it sounds like agreeing anyway. “Come to bed, if you’re coming.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick still hesitates. But he gets into bed, and when he slides in next to Kory, he wonders if it would have felt any different if she was his wife. If this would feel even more like coming home than it already does. If it could chase away the very idea of Mirage. As it is, her arms fit perfectly around him, and she chases off any lingering suspicions of an imposter with each and every sweet word. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He doesn’t propose tonight. But maybe someday, he could do it for real. Maybe if he did, it would cast out those few doubts that prickle in the back of his skull.<br/>
</span>
</p><p>
  <span>--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The fourth time Dick proposes, it’s not really </span>
  <em>
    <span>him </span>
  </em>
  <span>proposing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not in a ‘shapeshifters stole my body’ way. That would have really brought things full circle, he thinks, looking back. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But the fourth proposal wasn’t out of Dick’s mouth, which makes it even less of a proposal than the previous two. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They’re just winding down from a mission. Or rather, Kory is. Dick and Kory had been alternating who went out in the field, and who stayed home with Mar’i. Occasionally, when both were needed, she would stay with her uncles and aunts in Gotham, or her other uncles and aunts in San Francisco if there was a teammate who was injured and couldn’t join them in the field. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This time, Dick had stayed home to watch Mar’i, because the mission required Kory’s skillset, and he could run comms from the Tower anyways. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Which meant that Mar’i, three and a half, is sitting on the floor behind his chair and playing with blocks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Every now and then, she starts to float, but she knows how to get herself back down without hurting herself, and this room has a normal height ceiling, so Dick isn’t too worried. He can focus on the mission, and on making sure their team doesn’t run into any surprises. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Tanks on the western side,” he says. “Wally, you’re closest, do you copy?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I was closest a minute ago -- now I’m engaged with Jinx,” he says. “Sorry. Try Beast Boy?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“One of these days you’ll start calling me Beast Man,” Garfield grumbles. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Your own fault for choosing a name you’d age out of,” Raven replies.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick’s lips twitch. “Raven, Gar, chatter off the comms. Beast Boy, are you near the tanks?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Close enough. You need an ape on the scene, or a T-Rex?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Anything strong enough to overpower a shock-tank. Use your best guess. I don’t think either are shock-resistant though.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Garfield grumbles a curse under his breath. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick raises his brows. “Swear jar,” he scolds. “Mar’i’s in the room with me.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No I’m not,” Mar’i says, because no is her favorite word lately. Dick rolls his eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mar’i says hi, and that she doesn’t want to hear any more f bombs,” Dick lies. “Think you can handle that?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What happened to no chatter over the comms?” Raven teases. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Aw, be nice to Nightwing. He’s just being a good househusband.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick rolls his eyes. He can just </span>
  <em>
    <span>see </span>
  </em>
  <span>Donna’s expression, the grin she must have from ‘taking him down a peg’, as if it’s an insult. The idea of being a house</span>
  <em>
    <span>husband</span>
  </em>
  <span> is… He doesn’t hate it. But it’s the principle of the thing. “I was out on the field with you </span>
  <em>
    <span>yesterday</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s amazing how quickly things can change,” Donna says wistfully. “Star, you remember when he was out on the field with us? Way back in the day, with those cute shorts and beefy arms?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Must you talk about my househusband that way?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick’s face warms. It feels… different, when Kory calls him that. He’s either uncomfortable, or way too into it. He’ll figure it out after the mission, hopefully. “Starfire, how is the hostage situation going?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Donna and I have freed them. They are sitting with police, and their captors are in custody,” she says dutifully. Then, “Have you fed Mar’i her afternoon snack?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She ate half and used the other half as a toy. Unrelated, but there are now crumbs in all of her megalegos.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory sighs. They’ll be cleaning those out for ages. “What was this I heard about tanks, then? I can help Beast Boy.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Beast Man,” Garfield says. “And I could use some fire-power.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The mission gets back on track, and everything runs smoothly until the Titans get back to the Tower. They debrief and leave to shower and change into casual clothes -- </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But Donna lingers in the doorway. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There’s a very smug look on her face. Dick is pretty sure it’s the same look she had when she first called him a househusband. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So… Congratulations to the happy couple,” she says. “Kory’s showering. I just wanted to be my first to say it’s about time. Can I be best maid? Or do you think Kory will make me maid of honor?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick gives her a flat look over Mar’i’s head. He cuddles her to his chest, where she’s napping -- out like a light after playing for the last three hours. “You’re hilarious.” </span>
</p><p>"The funniest person you know. Really though -- you are kind of a househusband," Donna says fondly.</p><p>"No more than Kory is a housewife," Dick says. "We trade. It's a good system. Plus -- we aren't married."</p><p>
  <span>Donna makes a face like she doesn't quite believe him. "We'll see," she says. Then, she steps further into the room. She’s careful not to step on any of Mar’i’s toys, which still litter the ground. It’s become so commonplace that no one bats an eye anymore. Instead, she gently ruffles her niece’s hair before glancing down at Dick's rumpled appearance. Sweats -- the pre-Mar'i Dick Grayson would have worn his costume into the comms room. Having a toddler really had made him relax some of his more stringent rules. “...Need someone to watch her while you clean up?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll rope Wally into cleaning up,” he says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Donna raises a brow. “I meant showering.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I… didn’t go on the mission?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You aren’t going to shower before your date?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick just blinks at her. It’s then that Donna must realize he had no idea what she’s talking about, because she lets out a low whistle. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Your date with Kory,” she says. “For your anniversary.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And oh. </span>
  <em>
    <span>That </span>
  </em>
  <span>date. This is when they’d first started dating, at seventeen. Over thirteen years ago now. They’ve only had an actual anniversary date a handful of times. Even less often in the last few years. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We don’t really celebrate it anymore. We’ve been on and off again so many times,” he explains. “I don’t know if you can go by the first date when you’ve broken up and gotten back together. We might have to choose a new anniversary, after everything.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Donna gives him a funny look. “You could just choose the day you got married.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick’s hand spasms into a fist. His entire body tenses. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Mar’i must feel it, because she wakes up and makes a discontented sound. She’s too old to be too whiny or fussy, but she certainly doesn’t look happy. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You woke her up,” Dick says, exasperated, because it’s easier than telling Donna off for bringing up such a painful time in his life. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But Donna doesn’t drop it. “I know you guys technically got it annulled, but… You’re back together. Why </span>
  <em>
    <span>wouldn’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>you choose that date?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Because our wedding was a sham, he doesn’t say. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“When I want relationship advice, I’ll ask,” he says. Then he stands, shifting Mar’i in his arms so that her head is supported against his shoulder. He walks out of the comms room to find Mar’i’s room and set her down for a proper nap, but Donna follows. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She's not leaving it alone -- and for some reason, it makes Dick uneasy. “You could always propose again,” she says -- well meaning, earnest. “I can’t figure out why you haven’t. You clearly want to be together for the long haul. You can't possibly be planning on keeping this casual for much longer. So what is it?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We aren’t-” Dick’s voice is sharp, and Mar’i shifts in his arms. He lowers his voice immediately. “We aren’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>casual</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” he says, just bordering on gentle. “This is already a committed relationship. What’s it to you?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Mar’i will need to enroll in school soon,” she points out. “Kory is an alien, and Mar’i’s mom. It’s easier for moms to enroll their kids, but they might discriminate if she doesn’t have a human spouse.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick swallows. “Who said we were doing public school?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It gives Donna pause, but only for a moment. “Just think about it, alright?” She gives his arm a squeeze. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Househusband </span>
  </em>
  <span>isn’t such a bad thing.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It isn’t,” Dick agrees. “But we aren’t… It hasn’t come up. We haven’t talked about it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The question puts a frown on Donna’s face. “Not at all?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No.” Dick pauses. “...Why, has Kory said something?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Donna bites the inside of her cheek. “I’m not supposed to say,” she says, which means </span>
  <em>
    <span>yes</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Dick feels ice enter his heart. Should he be worried? Does Kory want to get married? Is she slipping away from him the longer he goes without proposing? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is she -- is she not happy?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What? No, no, Dick, that’s not it.” Donna is quick to reassure him, but it doesn’t make him feel any better. “We just talked. It’s just that Kory is one to commit. She’s had two other marriages to Tamaraneans, whereas you…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Whereas I </span>
  <em>
    <span>what</span>
  </em>
  <span>?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Donna flinches. Mar’i pulls away from Dick’s shoulder, and he realizes that he was holding her too closely. He swears inside his head, then loosens his grip. She settles back in for her nap, blissfully unaware of what memories Donna was dredging up. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’ve been with a lot more people than she has,” Donna says, carefully. “She’s your longest relationship by miles, but the way you got back together with Mar’i, and your other relationships…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick’s jaw flexes. “You think I’m not committed.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t say that.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You didn’t have to.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dick-” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick walks towards his daughter’s bedroom, pushing past Donna carefully, so as not to jostle Mar’i. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Donna doesn’t follow; Dick still waits until he’s inside Mar’i’s room to break. Or, perhaps break is too strong a word. The failed wedding happened so long ago that he never really feels like </span>
  <em>
    <span>breaking down </span>
  </em>
  <span>over it. But it still unsettles him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His head swims with imposters and ruined relationships and an unearned reputation for getting around.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As he’s pulling up Mar’i’s covers, she reaches out and pats his hand. “Don’t be sad, dat.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick manages a smile. “Everyone gets sad, starshine,” he says. “It’s okay to get sad. But I’m not sad right now.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Mar’i scrunches up her lips to the side -- clearly, she has doubts. But she’s too sleepy to follow her train of thought--and Dick doesn’t want to think, either. So instead of letting her ask, Dick just presses a kiss to her forehead. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It isn’t until he’s switched off the lights that he can think again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His thoughts aren’t any better than before. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He does plan on proposing -- he does. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He will.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Apparently, he has to. Apparently, he has something to prove. The break they took before Mar’i was born has come back to haunt him -- though something tells him that Donna wasn’t referring to that as much as his other relationships. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He buys a ring the next day. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As he lays in bed next to his soon to be fiancee, he wonders if he should be worried. He wonders if Kory thinks the same as Donna. He wonders what it was they talked about. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wonders if he’s making a mistake. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wonders… </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Is he </span>
  <em>
    <span>sure </span>
  </em>
  <span>it’s Kory sleeping next to him? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>--</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The fifth time Dick proposes, it’s the real thing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s been a week since his conversation with Donna, and the ring box has been wearing a hole in his gear drawer ever since. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s a beautiful ring. Silver, with a princess-cut emerald. It’s covered in a protective coating that makes it impervious to attacks -- which means it won’t get damaged if she takes it into the field. She probably won’t wear it into battle, though; too many chances of it getting lost. Still, if she gets pulled into battle before she can take it off, it’s better if it won’t shatter on impact. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As for the proposal itself, Dick’s practiced a thousand times over the last seven days. Never out loud, never for real. And he hasn’t mentioned anything to their friends -- not Donna, not Wally, not Roy or Vic or Bruce or Tim. No one. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Everything is perfect. Dick’s arranged a picnic for the day. Mar’i is staying with Donna and Damian, who said he’d teach Mar’i how to draw. Dick doubts it’ll go well, but Damian is unbelievably patient with her. They’ll have all afternoon with her -- and the proposal will go off without a hitch. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s the first time they’ve had a date in a few months. Even if he wasn’t proposing tonight, Dick’s been looking forward to some quality time together for a while. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And Kory looks radiant. She’s in pink, which always makes her look like she's glowing. Dick’s sure he’ll remember this dress on her for decades. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her smile is so beautiful -- and her hand is so warm in his. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But for some reason, his mouth is painfully dry. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His stomach is in as many knots as it was the first time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wants this, so why does he feel like he's going to be sick?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They’re watching the afternoon clouds for a full fifteen minutes before Dick finally finds the courage to say what he’s been meaning to say. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kory,” he says --</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And Kory’s eyes are bright, and beautiful, and lit up with a smile. “Yes?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean. Koriand’r,” he says again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory raises a brow.<br/>
</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dick Grayson,” she says, lighthearted. Teasing -- but with an undeniable question in her voice. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Koriand’r, Princess of Tamaran.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You have said my name enough times, Dick.” She reaches for both of his hands, and holds them gently. “You have my attention. What is it?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>In his head, Dick knows he can tell her anything. He can ask her anything. Even this. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His heart is a thousand beats per minute, though. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kory,” he says, again. “I want you to marry me.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory’s eyes go wide. “You… do?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It isn’t the reaction he’s expecting. But Dick’s hands are shaking, and he only has one shot at this. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He pulls out the ring box and opens it to reveal silver and green, shining in the sunlight. Kory’s eyes go wide. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I love you. I want to marry you,” he says. “I’m committed to you, Kory. Always. Not just because of Mar’i. I want us to be together, properly.” When she hasn’t said yes yet, he looks up at her, swallowing thickly. “Is that… something you want, too?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory is quiet. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then, she gently closes the ring box.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, Dick,” she says softly. “I’m so sorry. My answer is no.” </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>five reasons kory says no; <br/>or,<br/>the five reasons kory will say yes, someday</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Oh, Dick… I’m so sorry. My answer is no.” </span>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <span>The rest of Kory’s sentence gets lost until ‘no’ is the only word Dick hears. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The first thought that Dick has is that Kory isn’t Kory. But that doesn’t make sense, because Mirage had wanted him too. So how does Kory not want him? Neither of them would have said no. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Except, this is Kory. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There is no denying the concern and tenderness and guilt on her face. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Mirage never looked guilty. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick sucks in a sharp breath. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had pushed down Mirage for over a decade. Why is all of this coming back now? He’s thirty for god’s sake. He can’ still be upset about something that had happened when he was a teenager. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick pushes a hand against his forehead, then takes a few shaky breaths. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He’s not crying. Crying would be appropriate -- the love of his life just turned down his proposal. Why </span>
  <em>
    <span>isn’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>he crying? Why is he taking shallow breath after shallow breath? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory sits in front of him, hands against his arms. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dick, sweetheart. Breathe for me, will you?” Kory realizes the mistake in her words as soon as she says them. “Slower, I mean. Breathe slowly -- with me.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m not…” Dick manages, “I’m not having a </span>
  <em>
    <span>panic attack</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory looks doubtfully at him. She doesn’t argue though. Instead, she moves to sit behind him, and wraps her arms gently around his waist. She rests her chin on his shoulder, and presses her chest against his back. Soon, despite his protests, Dick finds himself breathing in tandem with her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>In. Hold. Release. In. Hold. Release. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It works. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He hates that it works. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He hates that not being able to see her works, because he doesn’t have to question who she is if he can’t see her. Her touch alone is enough to reassure him, because he knows Mirage would never care so much. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And he hates it. He hates doubting, wondering. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Why is she here, why is she taking care of him, when she just told him that she wouldn’t marry him? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick’s shoulders tremble, and this time, the tears do come. Kory holds him anyways. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A few minutes pass, and eventually, Dick calms down. He wipes his eyes with the heel of his hand, then Kory offers him a handkerchief, and he accepts it without complaint. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They sit in silence for another minute. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And finally, Dick clears out the lump in his throat. “Can you at least tell me why, if we’re over?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory pulls away immediately. She moves out from behind him, startled, with wide and worried eyes. “Dick, that isn’t what I was saying. I said I didn’t want to </span>
  <em>
    <span>marry</span>
  </em>
  <span> you -- not that I want to leave. You are my world. I love you -- I want to be with you forever,” she says gently. “And perhaps someday that will include marriage. But not yet.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She reaches for his face, still splotchy and red and wet, despite his best efforts with her handkerchief. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick’s face feels hot from the touch. Or maybe it’s his face that’s warmer than her hand, for once. He feels embarrassed enough to be lit on fire from the inside out. All he wants to do is pull away and bury his face in his knees. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But he can’t look away from the intense, pleading eyes she’s making. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I love you,” she says again. “Please. Don’t let us be over just because I can’t move forward with you yet.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick swallows. “Then… can you at least tell me why not?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory’s expression goes pinched. “Because you aren’t doing it for the right reasons. If I had spoken up last time, and we had worked out our problems instead of rushing into marriage, then perhaps we would have saved ourselves years of heartbreak.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick’s not so sure about that; his own heart feels like it’s breaking right now. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If you’d said no back then, that would have been it for us,” he says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory’s eyes soften. She strokes her thumb against his cheek. “No,” she says, “I don’t think it would have been. Just as I don’t think this is the end for us, either.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick swallows another lump in his throat. He wishes he felt so reassured and confident about that. Maybe it’s because she wasn’t the one that just got turned down. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He stares off into the distance, feeling drained now that he’s cried himself out. His emotions feel like they have been used up for the day -- something he’s not sure Kory has ever felt, being from a planet where emotions are everything. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He can’t fault her for it. But he feels too wrung out for this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We can talk later,” he finally says. “Right now, I just want to go home.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory nods. Then, together, they start packing up the remains of the picnic. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>--</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They’re early; Donna isn’t expecting them for another hour. And she certainly isn’t expecting Dick to arrive with a blotchy red face, or for Kory to be quite so somber. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even Damian, socially stunted as he is, seems to know better than to ask what had happened. Instead, he hesitates when he sees his dad and his mother-of-sorts. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We could keep her for the night, if you would like. She is old enough for her first sleepover,” Damian says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick hesitates. But he doesn’t want to be separated from his daughter, either. Instead, he silently shakes his head and picks up Mar’i. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory stands wordlessly behind him, still holding the picnic basket. Dick knows that the ring is inside -- he packed it away himself. But part of him wishes that they’d left the velvet box back at the park, so he never has to think about it again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Tomorrow morning we were planning on blueberry pancakes,” Kory says easily, taking the few things that they’d brought over to help babysit. “She would never forgive us if she missed them.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Donna nods, like it’s a real reason to pick Mar’i up early. However, while Dick is getting Mar’i situated in the baby holster, he sees Donna pull Kory aside, clearly asking what happened. Before he can interrupt whatever new conversation about his </span>
  <em>
    <span>commitment </span>
  </em>
  <span>they must be having, Damian interrupts him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She learned how to hold a crayon much faster than I was expecting,” Damian says, almost shyly. “She can’t color within the lines yet, but she will. She’s really good for her age” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick forces a smile. Then he ruffles his son’s hair. “You’re a good big brother,” he says. “I bet she loved hanging out with you today. Maybe next time we can all color together, yeah?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Damian actually blushes at the affection. Dick smiles a little more genuinely -- but his heart isn’t fully in it. It won’t be, until he can recover from tonight. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Oh, Dick… I’m so sorry, but my answer is no. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He closes his eyes, counting backwards from ten. He’s not going to start crying in front of his son. He’s just not. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>By the time he gets a handle on himself, Damian has slipped a hand into his. Dick startles, looking down at him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Damian goes on his toes and cups his hand like he’s going to whisper -- he’s a little old for it, but Dick is always happy when his son acts more like a kid. “What is it, Dames?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick leans down, and Damian whispers, “Are you and Kory fighting?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick feels like he’s swallowed a lemon. “Don’t worry about it,” he says. “It’s just… complicated.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Damian furrows his brows. Then he gets wide and horrified eyes. “Are you two breaking up?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s just a little too loud. Dick feels every eye on him -- Donna and Kory look up from where they were talking, and Dick cringes into himself. “No,” he says, making direct eye contact with Kory. “We aren’t.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He watches her tense shoulders soften. A tiny part of Dick feels better for making her relax. The rest just wishes this could have stayed between them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then he looks away, back down at Damian. He rests a hand on his kid’s shoulder, giving it a soft squeeze. “And even if we were,” he says softly, “It would be okay. She’ll always care about you. Just like I’ll always care about you. Mar’i is your little sister, no one’s taking her away from you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Damian’s face warms again. Then, he hugs Dick, gently squishing Mar’i between them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick gives him a solid squeeze right back. He’s careful about Mar’i, but it’s obvious Damian needs some support. And… truthfully, Dick needs a hug, too. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick ruffles Damian’s hair once they part. Then, he glances between Damian and Donna. “Are you staying with us tonight, or staying at the Tower?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Damian bites the inside of his cheek. It’s very obvious that he wants some more time with Dick, and Dick’s tempted to invite him to stay anyways. But Damian has been learning social cues from Donna and Kory, and from Dick himself -- and he must realize that Dick and Kory need to sort some things out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you and Kory both staying at the apartment tonight?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick glances up at Kory, who had answered for him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That is,” Kory adds, “I am. I would love your company if you want to, Dick.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick swallows, glancing between them. He wonders just how miserable he must look, for everyone to be treating him with kid gloves like this. He wants to say yes, to work things out tonight. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But he isn’t sure he can. He feels tired, wrung out. He just doesn’t have it in him right now. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I think I’ll stay at the Tower. There are some cases I need to work on,” he lies. “Dames, it’s really up to you. I’ll be working all night, so it’ll probably be more fun with Kory or with the other Titans.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Damian bites his lip. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll be taking care of Mar’i tonight, too -- it’s been a while since you and Kory hung out without having to look after your sister.” He knows it’s too tempting an offer to refuse. Damian is unabashedly fond of Kory. And as often as Dick and Damian have some father-son bonding, Damian doesn’t get nearly as much time with Kory. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even if the circumstances are rough, it’ll be good for them. And help to reassure Damian that he’s not losing the only mother figure in his life that never hurt him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>With that, Damian nods. He moves towards Kory, and Dick tries to smile at them. They start to fly away to the apartment. But before Dick can walk down to the lower levels of the Tower, where his case files and office are, Donna steps in front of the doorway. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dick,” she says. “Wait. Please.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick tenses immediately. “I’m really not up for talking, Donna.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know. I’m sorry -- Kory told me.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He swallows. “Yeah. It seems like she tells you a lot of things.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Donna winces. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Good</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Dick thinks. </span>
  <em>
    <span>She deserves it.</span>
  </em>
  <span> “It wasn’t like that,” she says. “Last week… It wasn’t what you think.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then what </span>
  <em>
    <span>was </span>
  </em>
  <span>it?” Dick’s voice raises without meaning to, and he forces himself to quiet down. He doesn’t want to wake Mar’i. “Because telling me I don’t seem committed, because of things that happened years ago -- that’s not a good look.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s been bothering you all week?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ve been in love with Kory since I was seventeen,” he snaps. “I’ve loved her for more than a decade. Yes, Donna. It fucking </span>
  <em>
    <span>bothers me</span>
  </em>
  <span> when someone tells me I don’t seem committed, and makes it sound like my girlfriend agrees with them.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Donna winces again. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you paranoid-” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not paranoia if </span>
  <em>
    <span>you’re the one who told me to be worried.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Dick grits his teeth. Realizing that Mar’i is starting to stir, he takes a deep breath, and forces himself to calm down. “Just drop it, Donna. Stop talking about my love life when you don’t know the facts.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Donna’s shoulders slump. But when he pushes past her, she doesn’t try to follow. Instead, she waits until he’s a few paces away before trying to talk again. “It wasn’t about you,” she says. “Someone asked her to sign the pictures Mirage posed for.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The mere sound of her name makes Dick flinch. His jaw flexes. But it’s easy enough to pretend he hasn’t no idea how these two thoughts are connected. “And so you decided I wasn’t committed?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It brought up a lot of old memories,” Donna says. “Mirage is just one of the other women you’ve been with. And Kory has been shamed about the photos for years. It doesn’t look great that she can’t even talk to you about it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick sighs through his nose. Then, he shakes his head and continues walking towards his office. “Like I said,” he continues. “If you don’t know all the facts, stop talking about my love life.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>With that, he rounds the corner. He’s beyond relieved when he doesn’t hear Donna’s footsteps following him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>--</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That night, Dick searches the pictures for the first time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He looks at the pictures, studies them for any sign that it was Mirage all along. Any hardness around her eyes, any strange angle of her hips, any scars out of place. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But the pictures are perfect. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Lewd, sleazy, and nothing that Kory would ever give to anyone but Dick -- but perfect. He can’t find a single difference between these pictures and the real Starfire. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wonders. If he had been able to tell the difference, would they have been married by now? Is the reason she said no because he hadn’t been able to tell the difference? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And yet, so soon after Mirage’s impersonation, she had said yes. Even despite her anger, despite her fear, she had said yes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The only difference now is that she’s older and wiser. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe that’s why. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick tucks Mar’i into bed and sings her a lullaby that he remembers his mother singing to him, over twenty years ago. He tries not to think of how happy Mar’i would be if he’d put her to bed with the surprise that her parents were getting married. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe she can be the flower girl at someone else’s wedding. Dick tries not to feel bitter. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>--</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The next morning, Kory sends him a picture of blueberry pancakes, and Dick takes Mar’i over to their apartment so she can eat her fill. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The breakfast table is silent. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not even Mar’i is up for her usual chatter. But after the stacks of pancakes have been eaten, Damian takes Mar’i away for another ‘drawing lesson’. Dick has a feeling it’s just to give them space. He gives his son a good morning hug anyways, and debates sneaking out the door before Kory can talk to him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He’s just about to reach for the front door handle when Kory speaks up. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you not ready to talk?” she asks, and she has the audacity to sound hurt. “By all means, if you need space, take it. But -- I really do want to stay together, Dick.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick picks at his mostly-full plate. He hangs his head, looking about as forlorn as he feels. “I want to, too.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then… if that is to happen, we must </span>
  <em>
    <span>talk</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Or, we could drop it and leave it alone.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory says nothing. And when Dick finally turns to face her, her expression is pinched and pained. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nothing to say? I thought you wanted to talk.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If that is really what you want,” she says. Guarded, and uncertain. Dick almost feels bad. Almost. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It is.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory steps closer, within arm’s reach. She crosses her arms over her chest, hands rubbing at her upper arms. “Then we can. But if you don’t let me talk to you about what I feel, then you have no right to become angry when I talk to Donna.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick swallows down the hot anger that bubbles up at the thought. “I’m not mad that you talk to Donna.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory raises both brows. Yeah, Dick wouldn’t have believed himself, either. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m angry that she took whatever you said and tried to intervene, with something that was deeply personal,” Dick grudgingly admits. “I’m angry that she thought it was her place. And… Yeah, alright. I’m angry that you talked to Donna, of all people, about </span>
  <em>
    <span>her</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You can say her name, Dick.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick shakes his head. “You already know who I mean.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory sighs, but doesn’t press. “‘Donna of all people,’” she quotes. “Why of all people? She wasn’t there as much when Mirage impersonated me. If anything, she’s perfect </span>
  <em>
    <span>because </span>
  </em>
  <span>of that. She’s impartial -- she wasn’t one of our teammates who belittled you, or who encouraged her sleazy behavior.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick purses his lips. He hasn’t forgotten how Garfield had sexualized Mirage’s version of Kory. He hasn’t forgotten how long-gone teammates like Pantha had mocked him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“All the more reason not to talk to Donna. She wasn’t even there. Why give details to yet another person, when we should be trying to put it behind us?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You won’t let me talk to you, you won’t let me talk to Donna -- who do you think I should be talking to about this, Dick?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No one!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory crosses her arms tighter over her chest. “Well, I promise you that won’t happen. I can’t just ignore this or bottle it. And I don’t think you should, either.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s been over a decade, Kory. Give it a rest. I said I didn’t want to talk.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Now you </span>
  <em>
    <span>really </span>
  </em>
  <span>sound like you did back then.” Kory purses her lips. “You wanted me to just drop it and move on then, too.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why act like that’s a bad thing? It caused us nothing but trouble.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Because we never discussed it,” she says firmly. “If we had, we wouldn’t be in this mess.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What </span>
  <em>
    <span>mess</span>
  </em>
  <span>? I proposed, and you told me no. That has nothing to do with... With her.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory’s eyes turn sympathetic, but only for a moment. “I think you know it has everything to do with Mirage.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I said I didn’t want to talk,” Dick says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I am not forcing you to. But you haven’t walked out the door yet.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick glances between her and the door. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She’s called his bluff. Dick sighs, then crosses his arms, no longer looking like he’s about to leave. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory nods. With that, she sits on the couch and pats the spot next to her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Still, Dick hesitates. He has half a mind to walk out the door and never bring it up again. To dump the ring down the drain, to move back to Gotham or Bludhaven or somewhere entirely new, and never think about the last decade of his life. He doesn’t know why he brought the ring with him today. Maybe to throw away. Maybe to try again. Maybe to shout and use it as a reason to break up with her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But Damian and Mar’i are just one room over. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And Kory… Kory is still waiting for him. On the couch, with that expectant look on her face. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>So Dick takes a breath, and finally, finally, moves to sit next to her. He keeps his distance for now, sitting on the exact opposite side of the couch. If Kory minds the distance, she doesn’t show it. Instead, she just looks glad that he didn’t walk out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Still, now that she’s gotten this far, she seems at a loss -- almost as much as Dick is. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But finally, she speaks up. “You can ask, you know.” She fidgets with her skirt, looking uncertain. “...Why I said no. We should talk about it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick closes his eyes. Of all the places to start. “Why are you so sure I'm not doing it for the right reasons?" </span>
  <em>
    <span>Why do you think I’m still stuck on Mirage, what gave me away?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory sighs, some of the energy going out of her. Dick gets the feeling that just because she’s arranging this talk, doesn’t mean she’s going to enjoy it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>At least the feeling is mutual. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“There’s precedent,” she says -- awfully reluctantly for the person forcing trying to open up. “Last time, you proposed because you thought our relationship was in trouble. I never want you to propose just to save a relationship. It was wrong last time, and it was wrong this time.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It wasn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>in trouble</span>
  </em>
  <span> this time. We’ve been together for three years -- we’ve been </span>
  <em>
    <span>great</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” Dick says, furrowing his brows. “You really think we were in dnager?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory bites her lip. “You have been different this last week. Distant and wary. And it’s not the first time. I don’t think that proposing would have fixed what you were worrying about, any more than it did last time.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And what am I so worried about?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please don’t play the fool, Dick. You’re too smart for it.” Kory pauses a beat, but Dick doesn’t answer for her. She sighs, then runs a hand back through her hair. “Fine. Donna talked to me, told me that she’d said something to you last week. But even if she hadn’t told me, I still noticed how you behaved. How sometimes, you look at me and still see her. You’re on edge, and somehow, you believe I don’t notice. But I do, Dick. How could I not? You’ve been doing this for </span>
  <em>
    <span>years</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wants to argue that he has dozens of triggers -- that there are a hundred reasons he could be on edge any day of the week. He could argue that he gets flashbacks about </span>
  <em>
    <span>most </span>
  </em>
  <span>of the traumas in his life, if the right situation pops up. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Mirage isn’t special. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And yet -- she is. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Because her memory has planted itself directly in the way of their relationship, time and time again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick could have proposed even before they had Mar’i. But he </span>
  <em>
    <span>couldn’t</span>
  </em>
  <span>. He could barely do it last night -- and look where that had gotten him. He isn’t going to forget that panic attack any time soon. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even hearing ‘no’ had forced him to remember Kory. All because she hadn’t seemed like herself, because he couldn’t have imagined her telling him no. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It doesn’t happen that often,” he finally says. He’s admitting to it, at least. But his body language couldn’t be more closed off. He crosses his arms and leans back against the couch. “It only happens with the wrong lighting. Or if I was already thinking about it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know.” Kory sighs, glancing at the picnic basket across the room. It’s been completely untouched since the failed proposal. “That’s why you reacted that way last night, isn’t it?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The panic attack. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He still doesn’t want to call it that -- but crying shouldn’t make him hyperventilate, either.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick isn’t here to be psychoanalyzed. He takes a breath, then lets it out through his nose. “I hate this,” he says. “I </span>
  <em>
    <span>hate </span>
  </em>
  <span>talking about her. She ruined everything. Without her, we would have been together for the last decade. No interruptions. We would have had Mar’i, and probably two other kids by now.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Perhaps,” Kory admits. “I… I’ll admit, she is the reason we fell apart.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then why talk about it? We will never be in a situation like that again. I can promise you that.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You say that, but…” </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>But you didn’t recognize that she wasn’t me.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Dick can almost hear her holding it back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory, however, doesn’t say it. Instead, she sighs and says, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Yes</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she caused the troubles that broke us apart. You’re right. But we both played a role in our destruction, too.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick feels a sudden, intense, vice grip on his heart. “No. She manipulated us -- we didn’t choose for her to do anything to us, Kory.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Not like that. You know I don’t blame you for anything </span>
  <em>
    <span>Mirage </span>
  </em>
  <span>did,” Kory says firmly. “But after the truth came out, Dick -- that </span>
  <em>
    <span>was </span>
  </em>
  <span>our choice. We were cruel to each other. We both said terrible things, and we broke up in a truly awful way. And instead of asking me to apologize, or apologizing for what you did after, you tried to fix it by proposing.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re the one who said yes.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And I had doubts the moment I did,” Kory admits. “We’ll never know what might have happened if Raven hadn’t interrupted the wedding. But I have a horrible feeling that we would have ended up divorced. Perhaps for good.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick wants to argue. But even he’ll admit that he had doubts about the wedding. Nearly all of their friends tried to talk him out of it. He’d been erratic ever since Mirage -- and though no one seemed to notice the cause, they did know him well enough to tell him he shouldn’t jump into a marriage. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>His shoulders slump, and the argument drains out of him. Dick runs a hand down his face, pulling at his tired eyes. “We can’t change the past, Kor. Talking about it now… it doesn’t fix things. It doesn’t change what we did, or what we said to each other.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It might not fix the past,” she admits. “But it could stop us from making the same mistakes again. It could give us a better future.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And you really want that future? With me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick doesn’t mean to say it so doubtfully. But how else is he supposed to feel? She turned him down just last night.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory looks as hurt as he expects when he finally looks to the other side of the couch. “Don’t say that. You </span>
  <em>
    <span>know </span>
  </em>
  <span>I love you,” she says. “The reason I am saying no, Dick… it’s because you never propose from love alone. Not before, and not now. She holds you back, makes you doubt our love, so you try to prove it with this big gesture. It’s not from your heart -- it’s from </span>
  <em>
    <span>fear</span>
  </em>
  <span>. And I don’t want fear to be the cornerstone of our relationship.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick crosses his arms over his chest. “What is it that I’m supposed to be afraid of?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But in his head, he hears Donna’s voice echoing, over and over again. </span>
  <em>
    <span>You think I’m not committed.</span>
  </em>
  <span> He wonders how many of their friends share her feelings.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know,” Kory says. “I wish you would tell me. Last night, I thought you might finally bring it up on your own, but then..." Kory continues. She closes her eyes. Sighs. "We can't do this again, Dick. I can only convince you to open up so many times, and I can’t be the only one who wants to fix us. I don’t want our marriage built on fear. We can’t keep moving forward and pretending that what’s behind us doesn’t affect us.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It doesn’t have to. It didn’t for years.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is that what you think?” Kory raises her brows. “You think I don’t notice that you’ve been flinching away from me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I have dozens of triggers, Kory. It’s not always Mirage.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory purses her lips. “Perhaps not always. Perhaps ...I am misguided. But did you consider why I came to this conclusion?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick frowns, brows furrowing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>When he doesn’t answer, Kory turns a little away from him, rubbing at her arm. She looks oddly embarrassed -- and it takes Dick a second to see what she means. But then he gets it. For her to jump to that conclusion, she must have been thinking a lot about Mirage, too. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And he knows that he wasn’t the only one who got messed up by her manipulations. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Still, Dick is on edge. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry you’re having a tough time,” he says. “But it’s in the past. And it’s not fair for you to assume I’m struggling just because you are.” He wants to stop himself, because he knows his tone is biting, but the next words come out of his mouth before he can stop them. “Besides. From what Donna told me, and from </span>
  <em>
    <span>your own words</span>
  </em>
  <span> back then, you had as much of a problem with me as you did with her. So remember that, next time you’re getting mad about how we don’t talk.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory goes still. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She says something in Tamaranean -- Dick doesn’t recognize the phrase. And from her carefully calm tone, maybe it’s best he doesn’t. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She takes a breath in, then exhales slowly through her nose. “I want to make things better, not worse -- and I am trying to resolve the marks Mirage left. I forgave </span>
  <em>
    <span>you </span>
  </em>
  <span>a long time ago. But if you haven’t forgiven me, then that is a separate problem. We can finish this conversation later, if you’re still angry.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory stands up, as if to leave. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And Dick knows he’s fucked up. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A small, bitter part of him thinks that the idea of her forgiving him is ludicrous. Either he wasn’t to blame or he was -- and if she’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>forgiving </span>
  </em>
  <span>him for something, then that has to mean she blames him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But instead, she seems sad. Sad, and frustrated.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick squeezes his eyes shut. He debates letting her leave, and finishing this talk later. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Instead, Dick reaches out for her hand. He finds it significantly warmer than usual. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wait, Kory-” He lets go of her hand almost as soon as he touches it. She doesn’t burn him -- she would never -- but he’d rather not hedge his bets right now. Besides, as a general rule when her skin heats up -- whether she intends it to or not -- it’s because she doesn’t want to be touched. “I was frustrated. I’m sorry, that wasn’t what I meant.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her eyes look almost… wet. Dick watches her with furrowed brows, wondering what it is that could have caused his girlfriend to get so upset. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She answers before he can even think of how to ask. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry, too,” she says. She crosses her arms over her chest, looking strangely vulnerable despite standing at 6’6” with more muscle definition than most olympians. He thinks for an instant that this will be like last night -- that she’s going to leave for real. But she calms his fears as soon as she reaches for his hand. It’s warm, but within her normal heat. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can I ask why you’re upset?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>For a moment, Kory looks even more frustrated. As though she expects him to already know.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I already know, I’m emotionally dense. But I really am lost, Kory.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She softens. “...Because you seem just as dismissive as you were back then. Wanting to brush it aside. I didn’t expect it to still hurt. But it </span>
  <em>
    <span>does</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kory…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She looks away. “If you don’t want to discuss this, we don’t have to. But I thought it might be good for us to finally work things out.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t think there was anything to work out before Donna ambushed me last week,” Dick says. “I thought we were fine. I thought things were good.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory’s shoulders droop. “They were! They are. They are still good, Dick. I promise. One major disagreement after years of being back together -- and it is a disagreement about the past? That is impressive for people in as high stress jobs as we have. Impressive for our volatile personalities. Impressive for two people </span>
  <em>
    <span>raising a child together</span>
  </em>
  <span>. If you want to drop this and never speak of it again, we can.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick senses it coming. “...But?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But… It does hurt that you want to.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It hurt that you didn’t want to marry me, after Donna telling me that that was what you needed.” He says it as flatly as he can, but he can’t quite hide the hurt in his voice. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Forget what Donna said, and listen to what </span>
  <em>
    <span>I’m </span>
  </em>
  <span>telling you, then,” Kory says. “You had no intention to propose before she put the idea in your head -- and she misread what I wanted, regardless.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick takes a moment to process that. He frowns, brows furrowing. Then, he slowly sits back on the couch. An invitation for her to sit down too -- for them to talk. “Now I’m really confused,” he admits. “What was it, if not my commitment issues?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You love me. That’s enough of a commitment. I can’t ask you for more than that.” Kory looks uncertainly between Dick and the other side of the couch. Then, she tucks a lock of hair behind her ear, and reluctantly sits on the cushion next to him. It’s already an improvement from before. “... We discussed two things. I came to her to talk about Mirage, because you… you don’t like talking about her, and I didn’t want to force it on you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick swallows. “Oh.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Her photos were making the rounds again, and someone asked me about them recently. It bothered me, and I just… needed someone to tell me that I’m not overreacting. That it’s not petty to still be angry about how she violated me.” She holds her arms closer to herself and looks away. Dick can’t quite hide how uncomfortable the mention of those photos makes him. The evidence is still out there, even after all this time. Evidence that no one could tell the difference between Mirage and Kory. It wasn’t just him. “...But it wasn’t just that, either.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What else?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick wonders if she notices how quickly he latches onto any topic that isn’t Mirage. Judging by the look on her face, like she just swallowed something bitter, she does. “...I talked to Bruce, when I was dropping Damian off in Gotham for the weekend.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Now that -- that </span>
  <em>
    <span>is </span>
  </em>
  <span>news. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“...Did he say something to you?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s… It was something he thought I already knew.” She pauses -- Dick knows she’s still debating telling him. But Dick waits her out; she has never been able to stop once she gets started. “He said that Damian was doing very well with us -- but that he was surprised at how much of a mother figure I was to him, when up until three years ago he would never have met me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh.” Dick frowns. He’d expected it to be more serious than that, but he’s glad it’s not. “I’ll talk to him -- I’m sorry, Kor. But you know you can talk to me about that, right? No one’s more equipped to deal with Bruce’s emotional constipation than I am. You didn’t need to talk about it with Donna.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dick, I can handle a few misspoken compliments from your dad.” She looks away, eyes pained. “I… I don’t doubt your commitment anymore. I need you to know that.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She says it -- and yet, Dick can’t quite believe her.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I don’t doubt your commitment anymore.</span>
  </em>
  <span> ‘Anymore.’ It makes his stomach twist. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He hates knowing how alone he’d left her back then. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And he has a feeling that even if she says she doesn’t doubt his commitment, that it might not ring as true as she thinks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But you have doubted it before,” he says. “Back when you were pregnant with Mar’i. You doubted that I wanted you. Does that… is it still bothering you?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory’s shoulders tighten. From her reaction, Dick guesses that that’s exactly what Donna had asked. And that they were both right to ask. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kory - it’s okay. We’ve worked it out by now. You know I’m committed to you. Don’t you?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She doesn’t say anything. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick feels dread pool in his stomach. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh,” he says -- suddenly feeling very small. “You don’t.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s not so simple,” she says quickly. Anything to save their relationship, he thinks. “Dick… When I was pregnant with Mar’i, I intentionally hid it from you so that I would know, once and for all, that you wanted me. I didn’t want you to feel trapped into a relationship just because you were going to be a father.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I wasn’t going to feel </span>
  <em>
    <span>trapped</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Kory. If anything, it made it easier to get out of Gotham and finally be with you, with no one trying to pull me back.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Maybe.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory sounds horribly unsure of herself. She’s quiet for a moment, biting her lip as she debates how to say what she’s clearly hurting about keeping hidden. So Dick waits. She’s never been one to keep her feelings contained for long.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“...Maybe you are right,” she says, after a long pause. “But my entire plan was to know that for once, that it was me you wanted. That you weren’t just scared of losing me as an option. Love is eternal for my people -- I was never going to stop loving you. But every time you went back to Gotham, every time we took a break… it hurt, Dick. So just for once, I wanted to know that you were coming back because you wanted to. Not because of a convenient circumstance.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Once again, Dick feels like he’s been punched in the stomach. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He knew, on some level, that that was how she felt. But to hear it out loud, even three years later… It broke his heart. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kory… I came back for you. And I haven’t left since.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But it was </span>
  <em>
    <span>after </span>
  </em>
  <span>you knew about Mar’i,” she says, so softly he almost misses it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick swallows, a sour feeling bubbling in his throat. He feels sick -- genuinely sick. “I love you. I came back because I love you. If you’d lost Mar’i, I still would have stayed.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Out of guilt?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kory-” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Two weeks ago, Bruce told me that just before you came back to me, you had intended on staying in Gotham for the rest of your life. Or at least to help raise Damian. And now you have both your children here. You cannot tell me that they did not factor into your decision.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And that -- that’s what this is really about, isn’t it? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not just Mirage and the problems that had broken them up. But Bruce, and the time they’d spent apart. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t think I had a choice,” he says. “I thought we talked about it plenty. He’s back, and even if he was to die tomorrow, I wouldn’t put on the cowl again. My place is here, with you and Mar’i and Damian.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know that. I’m sure of it. We’re good together, and I know you love me. But if things had gone differently-” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“They didn’t,” Dick says stubbornly. Then, he frowns, one thought still not lining up. “But all this is just making me more confused, Kory. If you thought I wasn’t committed to you, then why on Earth would you reject me when I proposed? Isn’t that an ultimate act of commitment?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Maybe that’s how you see it. But marriage isn’t a magic way to fix things,” Kory says. “We view marriage differently, I think. On Tamaran they could be used to fix politics. And here, you seem to believe that they will fix love. But it does neither.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Just because it won’t fix things doesn’t mean we shouldn’t. Before last night, I didn’t even think there was something to fix.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t lie to yourself, Dick. You have been obsessing over what Donna said for a week now,” Kory says. “You proposed to fix it -- again.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick can’t deny that. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He won’t deny that. But he won’t talk about it, either. Instead, he reaches for anything else to counter her. “You didn’t even know Donna had talked to me. You didn’t think there was anything to fix, either.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I-” Kory stops short. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick thinks he might have actually caught her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But she shakes her head. He thinks she’s counting to five in Tamaranean, to keep her calm and focused. He’s jealous that it works for her better than it ever did him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Once she’s reached five, she starts again. “That is not what we are talking about,” he says. “But if it is bothering you, fine. I did think there was something to fix, and that something was Mirage. It had been bothering me for a week, that I couldn’t go to the love of my life to discuss something that had made me feel deeply violated.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You… you could have tried,” Dick manages. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory raises a brow. “You can’t even say her name.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She has a point. She’s always been sympathetic, knowledgeable of his needs and his limits. She’d never force something on him if it was unnecessary. Going to Donna was par for the course. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Still. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If I could, would you have said yes?” </span>
</p><p><span>“Dick, if you had dealt with this trauma earlier, I would have proposed to </span><em><span>you. </span></em><span>I almost did,</span> <span>two years ago.” </span></p><p>
  <span>Dick wonders if she was thinking about the same thing, that morning in the kitchen. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He’s too afraid to ask. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is it fair to refuse to commit, just because of one mistake we made as teenagers?” Dick asks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is it fair to marry someone who you can’t open up to?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory’s sharp eyes are a perfect challenge for his own. Dick meets her gaze as best as he can, but there is something so fierce and determined in them -- he breaks first. Dick averts his eyes, leaning further into the cushion of the couch. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I won’t marry you as long as you are using marriage as a way to ‘fix’ us,” Kory says firmly. “We are fine as is. And someday, I want to marry you. My answer shouldn’t have been ‘no’, perhaps. Only ‘not until.’ Not until we can tell each other everything, without holding anything back. Marriage is for equal partners. And right now, we are hiding too much from one another.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hiding too much from </span>
  <em>
    <span>one another</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick frowns. He knows that’s a dig at him, more than her. Kory is normally an open book, unless it’s about a topic that he has shot down. But then again, he never knew how deeply she had been worried about his commitment until today, so maybe there was more to it than that. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“...Okay,” he finally says. “You said we hide things from each other. </span>
  <em>
    <span>We </span>
  </em>
  <span>involves us both. What else do I need to know about you?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory looks up, startled. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you … actually asking?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t like talking about… about her. And I don’t want to talk about how she makes me feel. But if it’s about what she did to you, then I can at least try to listen.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He still feels a little sick. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But it’s worth it -- at least, he thinks so so far, before she’s started talking. He hopes that he’ll still feel the same when they’re twenty minutes in and she’s baring her soul. There would be nothing worse than cutting her off after finally letting her open up, after a decade of swallowing down the hurt. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory bites her lip. “You’re sure you’re ready?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Equal partners</span>
  </em>
  <span> says I need to try, Kor.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory fixates her gaze on her lap, smoothing out the wrinkles on her dress. She fidgets -- a habit he thinks she might have picked up from him, funny enough. It doesn’t suit her as much as it suits him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>For how long it had taken to let her open up, he would have thought she’d be less reluctant. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But he knows that she doesn’t want to discuss this. She has only ever framed it as a </span>
  <em>
    <span>need </span>
  </em>
  <span>-- something they must accomplish. No one would want to dredge up old pain unless there was a reason. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>So Dick reaches for her hand. She looks up at him, startled -- but he just gives her a soft squeeze. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You wanted me to ask, Kor,” he says quietly. “Maybe I should be the one asking if you’re actually ready to open up.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She smiles, but it’s faint -- pained. “I can. But just as love is forever for Tamaraneans… there are certain pains that don’t fade, either.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick furrows his brows. But before he can ask, Kory takes a breath. And finally, she speaks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It no longer affects me as directly, I think, as it affects you,” she says. “Except for the photos. She did real damage to my image, and to my career. But she did the same to you, with the infidelity rumors. We have that in common, I think. She made the world think we were playthings, so absorbed with sex that we didn’t care about emotion, or commitment. Even though that was never what we were before. If that was the worst she did, that would still be awful. But there was more.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She bites her lip again, hesitant. And Dick hates that he makes her hesitate, makes her fire flicker, when she’s normally so strong and steady. “We fixed that, as much as we could,” Dick says. “It’s not top of mind for most people.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Maybe Mirage isn’t. But people can still search for photos -- and from what I hear, it is top of mind for most people when they think of you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That was partly my own fault.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No.” Kory squeezes his hand. “You were never so shallow. I’ll admit I was surprised when I heard of your partners. But I was gone for two years -- we broke up. I got </span>
  <em>
    <span>married </span>
  </em>
  <span>when I was on Tamaran. I have no place to judge you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Married and widowed, Dick doesn’t point out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I missed you,” Dick admits. “No one could have replaced you. I guess I should’ve stopped trying.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They’re quiet for a moment. That’s when Dick remembers what it was they were really trying to get at.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You were talking about what else she did,” he says. “What else?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory squeezes her eyes shut. “She mainly triggered… what do you call them? Old hurts? Whereas, with you… the </span>
  <em>
    <span>first </span>
  </em>
  <span>trauma is always the worst. We remember them, even when something new hurts us.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick knows that one first hand. Those two years away from Kory had given him new pains that he hopes to never face again. He doesn’t know if he’ll ever be able to talk to her about those. He hopes he doesn’t have to. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t realize she’d hurt you that badly,” Dick admits. “Was it -- was it the nature of how she impersonated you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>To his surprise though, Kory shakes her head. “No. Not at first, that is. It -- it was that she kidnapped me,” she admits. “The photos are a reminder of that, and I’ll admit, being used for sexual purposes without my consent -- that does hurt. But my body was not violated the way yours was. But she still kidnapped and imprisoned me. I… I don’t think I have to explain why that hurt me so badly.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>For an instant, Dick wants to ask. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>But then it clicks. His mouth goes dry from horror. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh,” he breathes, feeling suddenly very small. Small and incompetent, for not noticing. “Fuck -- </span>
  <em>
    <span>Kory</span>
  </em>
  <span>. I’m so sorry. I didn’t even think-- we got kidnapped plenty of times as Titans. I didn’t think you … I didn’t think you would associate it with the Citadel.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory attempts to make a reassuring face -- but her expression is so pained that it has the opposite effect. Dick feels worse, somehow. “But that was the only time I had been kidnapped and held hostage alone,” she says miserably. “I had no other Titans around me, no one to tell me this was part of being a superhero. The only thing I could think was that the Gordonians had found a way to capture me yet again. Or perhaps some new slave, or someone angry with how I had destroyed their slave rings.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick has no idea what to say. Nothing he could say could change what happened, or make her feel better. So he does what he can, and just holds tightly to her hand. “I’m so sorry, Kory.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s in the past,” she says -- but the faraway look in her eyes says otherwise. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick is quiet for several seconds. But eventually, he can’t help but overthink, to analyze. “...You didn’t seem,” he starts, not sure if there’s a good way to phrase this. “You seemed angry. Not hurt. I didn’t realize. Maybe I should have realized, but -- I never associated your anger with pain.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory lifts one shoulder, a horrible approximation of a shrug. “Sorrow isn’t the only reaction you can have to being in pain. And… at times, it’s easier than feeling hollowed out,” she says. “I was furious, and I never tried to hide it. I openly despised her, I wanted to kill her for what she did to me -- and for what she did to you. I was furious about being kidnapped, furious about being replaced." </span>
</p><p>
  <span>For an instant, Dick wants to stop her. He doesn’t want to think about what Mirage did to him. But he stops himself. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Instead, he tries to expel the memory of Mirage’s hands on his hips. The way she had smiled -- such a perfect approximation of Kory’s, even if the words she said, even if her actions were so different. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>To his surprise, time passes, and Kory is in front of his face. “Dick?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m still here,” he says quickly. “I’m sorry.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, don’t. I shouldn’t have pushed. I shouldn’t have said anything.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>For an instant, Kory tries to stand and leave. But Dick keeps hold of her hand, even if he can’t meet her eyes for longer than a moment. “Stay. Please.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She stays seated. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It takes Dick a second to come back to himself. “I know, in my head, that trauma can be expressed through anger,” he says. “It… it did the same to me. Does the same to me, sometimes. I should have known it would do the same for you. But…” He hesitates again. “But you were also angry with </span>
  <em>
    <span>me</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Kor. I can’t forget that. And in your anger, you told me I should have known the difference."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I also told you in the beginning that I didn't blame you. </span>
  <em>
    <span>That</span>
  </em>
  <span> never changed."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But you told me I should have known the difference. That sure sounds like blame, Kory.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You were a detective,” Kory says. “And she was nothing like me. I know the way you flinched away from me, Dick. It wasn’t just that she impersonated me. She acted in ways that I didn’t -- so now, any time I am different, any time I feel something you don’t expect, you are brought back to those moments. If she was so different from me, I -- I don’t understand how you could have thought she was me.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And now, they’ve really come back to the beginning. Dick winces. “If I had known there was a shapeshifter on the loose, I would have suspected immediately,” he says. “You know that. But her illusions make her seem exactly like who she impersonates. Even when she made me change my costume and hair, it -- something about it made me think that you were just…” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You told me that you liked it when she impersonated me. When you proposed.” Kory swallows. “That you liked how forward she was.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“When I thought she was </span>
  <em>
    <span>you-</span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And you said it while </span>
  <em>
    <span>proposing</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Dick. And I accepted.” She lets go of his hand, both of her hands tightening into fists. “You weren’t the only one who tried to fix things by getting married. I wanted to stop being angry. Before that, it was like I couldn’t stop. I wanted to, but I couldn’t.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick frowns, creases forming between his brows. "It sure didn’t seem like you wanted to stop being angry when you stormed out on me. We broke up -- and </span>
  <em>
    <span>you </span>
  </em>
  <span>were the one who left.” He pauses. “I’m not saying that to blame you -- but you have me no reason to believe that you still wanted to be together.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So that’s why you crashed in and attacked my friend, after we broke up? Is that why you demanded we get back together, why you treated me like wayward property? Because you had no reason to think we still wanted to be together?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kory, you know that’s not fair.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, it’s not,” she says, more harshly than Dick expects. “I’m sorry that my trauma wasn’t neat and pretty, Dick. I’m sorry that it was easier to be angry, to be hostile and defend myself, than to act as wounded as I felt. Is that what you’re looking for?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>When Kory finishes, Dick looks as taken aback as he feels. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>For an instant, Kory meets his eyes with a sharp look. But just as quickly, she looks down, guilt clouding her eyes. She puts a hand to her forehead, as if trying to rub the emotion away. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It must work, because when she speaks again, her tone is gentler. More like the Kory he knows and loves. "...I </span>
  <em>
    <span>am </span>
  </em>
  <span>sorry. I meant to apologize a long time ago.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It isn’t an apology I’m looking for. Not anymore.” Dick bites his lip. “I just … I want to know why. You were never cruel before, but the way you talked about her, how you kept saying I deserved her, acting like I wanted her… I know now that you were dealing with your own trauma. But why didn’t you talk to me about it back then?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I did try.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick frowns. “If you did, I don’t remember.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t say it was a </span>
  <em>
    <span>good </span>
  </em>
  <span>attempt,” Kory says -- tone dry, almost humorous. “...I spoke in anger. I wanted you to care, to realize what I really meant, but you brushed it off, and…” She trails off. “It doesn’t matter how angry I was, I shouldn’t have said those things. But I had just found out how poor a job she did at imitating me. And knowing that she didn’t even act like me when she seduced you... When I brought it up, you completely brushed it off. She held me </span>
  <em>
    <span>captive</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Dick. You didn’t even know that I was missing, and you treated it like it was </span>
  <em>
    <span>nothing</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Like it was nothing, that I could disappear and be replaced.” </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>‘Oh, c’mon, Kory, are you still upset about that? You know I love you.’ </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick winces. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And the way you spoke of her, how you allowed her on our team, to live in our headquarters..." She closes her eyes. "I was so hurt and angry I couldn’t think. She held me captive, and -- every time someone takes me, you </span>
  <em>
    <span>know </span>
  </em>
  <span>what it does to me. But I </span>
  <em>
    <span>wanted</span>
  </em>
  <span> to talk it through. I wanted to fix things."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And he believes her. But he also remembers what came next, in that conversation. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>'X'Hal, don't you know what that does to me? Go ahead, if you want her, take her! You deserve her! I don't want to see you again, ever!'</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>'Kory, don't! Kory! You know I don't care for her. I wasn't paying attent-- I mean, I didn't know I was sleeping with her. I thought it was you! Kory, you know I love you!'</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“You said you’d wanted to talk, but you didn’t show it at all.” Before Kory can reply, Dick holds up a hand. “Just listen, please. You told me that I should have known the difference between you,</span>
  <em>
    <span> told me I deserved her,</span>
  </em>
  <span> then flew away before I could say anything. I know -- I </span>
  <em>
    <span>know </span>
  </em>
  <span>-- that you weren’t fully yourself, that you were dealing with trauma. But I… I also need to know that it won’t happen again. You have your hurts, but Kory… that hurt for years. No matter how much you say you don’t blame me, I’ve been thinking you blamed me for the last decade.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory parts her lips. “Dick… I promise you, I don’t blame you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And I know that now.” He pauses. “But I need to know that you won’t say something like that again. That you won’t… that no matter what happens, you’ll give me the benefit of the doubt.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It takes a minute. But finally, Kory reaches for his hand. “I won’t. That is why I wanted to talk. To know why we did what we did.” She pauses. “To answer you… I promise. I </span>
  <em>
    <span>swear </span>
  </em>
  <span>to never make you feel like that again.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick squeezes her hand right back. “I believe you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She manages a faint smile. “I notice we’ve talked a lot about what happened from my perspective,” she says. “If I am simply leading by example, that’s okay. I won’t force you to tell me. It has to be something you want for yourself, for it to help.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And this -- this is the mediating, understanding Kory he knows. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The one who, their first night together after Mirage, had checked in with him dozens of times. The one who had asked him what he needed, who had told him a thousand things that only Dick knew about her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Maybe soon,” he finally says. “I feel kind of wrung out right now.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory smiles ironically -- but it’s genuine enough to make her eyes crinkle. “I know the feeling,” she says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick leans over to kiss her. Kory leans in, too -- and although it has a fraction of their usual heated kisses, it still feels like her. It’s as reassuring and sweet as it always is. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>When he pulls away, Dick’s expression goes a little more serious. “I think we need to lay a few ground rules.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory raises both brows in surprise. “About?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“All of this,” he says. “But especially trauma about… about her.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She tilts her head. “What did you have in mind?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick takes a deep breath. Then, he slowly lets it out, brain working as hard as ever, developing the plan that’s been burning at the back of his mind. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“First -- If you are ever kidnapped again, I need you to know that I will always come for you,” he says. “I never realized how unsafe you must have felt afterwards, thinking that if you were taken again, someone might not realize.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory’s lips part in shock. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick knows she hadn’t really said as much -- but it doesn’t make it less true. Her shoulders shrink on themselves, and Dick knows that she feels embarrassed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s to make you feel better, not worse,” Dick says softly. He reaches for her hand, giving it a squeeze. “Earth is your home, Kory. You deserve to feel safe. I love you too much to let you suffer in silence.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She bites her lip. But finally, she nods -- it’s so small that Dick almost misses it. But it's an agreement nonetheless.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I agree,” she says softly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Second,” he continues, “I promise, I will tell you what I need about … about-” He hesitates on the name. “About Mirage. You’re right. She’s been haunting the back of my mind for over a decade. And as long as we’re together, I… I deserve to know that I’m safe with you -- the </span>
  <em>
    <span>real </span>
  </em>
  <span>you. By now, I should be able to open up -- but you know how stubborn I am. It took me being unable to sleep for a month to get me into therapy after the Brotherhood of Evil.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“...Are you considering therapy for this?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick chuckles. “I wouldn’t go that far yet. We’ll see. If I still can’t bring myself to open up in six months, then you can frogmarch me to therapy yourself.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory smiles despite herself. “I will mark it on my calendar.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Third,” Dick continues, as though he hadn’t heard her, “...If something hurts us again… I need to know that we won’t be awful to each other.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory’s mood dips once more, and Dick knows she’s feeling guilty again. He gently reaches for her arm. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This isn’t blame. Trust me, I know about lashing out in anger. When the worst things happen, I… I always self-destruct. I make all kinds of bad choices when I’m hurting,” he says. He won’t provide the worst examples, but Kory has seen enough of the smaller ones to recognize what he means. “But we can’t direct that on each other. I can’t lash out at you or hide things or disappear to Gotham. But I need to know you won’t lash out at me or steal our daughter away to Tamaran.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I wouldn’t,” Kory says. “I won’t. I promise, I never will. You’re her father as much as I am her mother. I wouldn’t do that to you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Dick nods, then gives her hand a reassuring squeeze. “Then we both agree.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you have more conditions?” Kory says, almost, almost teasing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fourth, you will </span>
  <em>
    <span>tell me</span>
  </em>
  <span> how to fix your doubts about my commitment to you.” Dick looks into her eyes, unable to mask how pained this one still makes him. “I know I’ve been a big reason for the divide between us. And I know I’ve asked you to be patient with me in the past -- but it’s been a decade together. We’ve had so many ups and downs and long breaks. I can’t blame you for not being sure. But I won’t stop until I know, for sure, that you have no more doubts. I know your plan around Mar’i makes you question what we have -- and I know there’s no way to go back and undo that. But I promise. We’ll find a way to move past it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This time, Kory hesitates. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>For a second, Dick fears she’ll say no. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Instead, she squeezes his hand. “I will always love you. I promise to be open, and I promise to tell you if my doubts return. I promise not to leave you in the dark about my fears.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s all I can ask,” Dick says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory leans in for a kiss, and Dick meets her part-way, as always. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>When they separate, Dick hesitates. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fifth,” Dick says with an uncertain look in his eye. “Fifth, I promise we won’t get married until we’re good and ready. Until we’ve been meeting the other four conditions for a while.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Deal,” Kory says. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>With that, Dick reaches into his pocket -- and watches as Kory’s expression turns from an uncertain smile, to simply uncertainty. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She stares at the ring in his hand. “I don’t understand,” she tells him. “I… I thought you weren’t proposing.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Despite himself, Dick presses it into her hand, gently closing her fingers around it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>When she starts to pull away, Dick shakes his head. “I’m not asking again so soon. I don’t think I could take two ‘no’s in as many days,” he says, almost jokingly. “This isn’t a proposal. At least, not like the one last night.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory bites the inside of her cheek. She looks a little pained, and Dick knows that she would still turn him down, even after talking for most of this afternoon. Even after establishing ground rules. “Then what…?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I can’t promise that you’ll never be taken again, or that you’ll never have a relapse in trauma. I don’t think either of us can promise that, barring a total mind wipe. I can’t promise that we’ll never lash out in anger when we’re hurting. We’ve both been through too much.” He smiles grimly. “...But I can promise that if anyone hurts you, if anyone takes you, that I won’t rest until you’re in my arms again. I can promise that I’ll always love you. So I </span>
  <em>
    <span>do </span>
  </em>
  <span>want to marry you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I love you,” Kory says softly. “...but you said this wasn’t a proposal.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It isn’t,” he says. “It’s okay, I know you -- I </span>
  <em>
    <span>know </span>
  </em>
  <span>we aren’t there yet. But I want you to have this. To know that I do want you. That I </span>
  <em>
    <span>love </span>
  </em>
  <span>you. And as long as I’m alive, that I want to make this work. You can put it on whenever you’re ready, or whenever you think </span>
  <em>
    <span>I’m </span>
  </em>
  <span>ready.” He pauses. “...Consider it an ongoing proposal. We’re together, you’ve said no. I still want to get married -- I doubt that will ever change. But you’re right. We’re not ready </span>
  <em>
    <span>yet</span>
  </em>
  <span>. And since you know me better than I know myself -- I’ll know we’re ready when you finally put it on.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Kory’s face is even warmer than usual when Dick leans over to kiss her cheek. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He’s not quite prepared when she throws her arms around him. If it were any tighter, his bones would be creaking -- but Kory holds back just enough to keep from hurting him. Instead, he just feels warm, and loved. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know when it will be,” Kory says quietly. “I wish I could tell you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’ll work on it. We have plenty of time.” Dick runs a hand up and down her back. “I love you, though. </span>
  <em>
    <span>That </span>
  </em>
  <span>won’t change.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I love you, too,” she says softly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And Dick believes her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As devastating as her first answer had been, Dick doesn’t feel any doubt anymore. She </span>
  <em>
    <span>does </span>
  </em>
  <span>love him -- and whether they get married in one month or twenty years, Dick knows that they will be together through everything. </span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>OK HERE WE GO FOR REAL THIS TIME</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>--</p><p>also before anyone is confused in the comics, some FACTS about kory and mirage:<br/>-mirage took kory captive for 3 days. no one came to free kory; she freed herself. related: kory has trauma related to being in captivity considering she was sold, taken captive, and essentially a slave for years.<br/>-mirage posed as kory, which is why no one knew kory was missing.<br/>-mirage used korys body to create and sell incredibly sleazy pictures, ruining her reputation. it was very unlike kory to pose in that way or do something so sleazy.<br/>-mirage also changed dicks style, pressuring him to changing his hair and costume -- something kory would also never do.<br/>-mirage had sex with dick while pretending to be kory. this is known as rape by deception.<br/>-when the truth came out, kory was actually FURIOUS with mirage, and pointedly said that she didnt blame dick<br/>-AFTER having kory say she didnt blame dick, the writers had kory do a 180 on this perspective because dc decided they wanted to break up dick and kory. they needed more drama before they split them up. this was the first seed of discontent between them.<br/>-kory, under this new writing decision, is upset with dick because he didnt know the difference between her and mirage. this is WILDLY ooc because shes a canon rape victim. however... considering what mirage had her do, i actually somewhat understand her perspective -- ESPECIALLY because she has trauma about being in captivity. the idea that someone posed as her (and acted wildly out of character for her) and no one knew she'd been replaced, must have hurt. she's wrong to say it, but like... dick is a detective, so i half understand what she meant, even if she was wrong.<br/>-dick decided to propose to save their relationship. it ended up backfiring, obviously. they never worked out their issues re: mirage, and rushing into marriage was a big part of that. </p><p>im taking these concepts and im going to explain them further in the next chapter. this is just so yall are aware that i know what im doing</p></blockquote></div></div>
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